Don’t apologise I didn’t mean that in relation to you. I meant that for me I try to be upbeat so as not to worry family and friends but that they maybe need to hear that there are days when the tears keep coming. That you are nit ok.
You are so early in your grief. It hits you every morning on waking hard in your heart that they are still gone. 18 months on the hit is not as hard. Take care sending a hug. X
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Thank you Cooki why do ppl think after a couple of weeks you are ok. The tears fall fast the heart ache is a longing i would never wish on anyone. Xx
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You don’t know until you are in that situation.
I think of bereaved friends and I did as everyone did phoned couple weeks move on. How different would I be now if friend /family lost someone. I’d continue the calls , let them cry, invite out, drop in. Easy with the knowledge we have from grieving ourselves.
Chat on here when you are down or private message it’s a long road we travel.
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Lijewise Cookie I would never leave someone to go through this alone its awful. I never thought my family would be so cold.xx
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Well I’ve tried telling people how i feel and in a lot of cases i found its like talking to the wall … x
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Yes.
I have found the same xx
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Hello, I feel for you… and agree, most people seem to want smiley superficial contact, and there are very few you can really communicate your innermost feelings. Also, people seem to pick up on how vulnerable you are, and can use this sometimes in quite unkind ways… im only saying this because ive had bad treatment from so called friends and aquaintances, which has made me step back and feel more isolated.
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Hello, I feel for you… and agree, most people seem to want smiley superficial contact, and there are very few you can really communicate your innermost feelings. Also, people seem to pick up on how vulnerable you are, and can use this sometimes in quite unkind ways… im only saying this because ive had bad treatment from so called friends and aquaintances, which has made me step back and feel more isolated.
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My guess is that most of us feel the same. We go out and see people and it really does help take your mind off things but the coming home on your own is the really difficult part. Everything seems to come flooding back. I find the loneliness is the worst part.
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I totally agree. You really dont understand unless you have been in this situation. I would behave differently now to someone who is going through this. I would try and offer more support. I also often say I’m fine when people ask but sometimes i wish i could just say I’m having a bad day please come and visit.
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Please view this candle as being lit in remembrance of your greatly missed love ones.
I hope it brings some comfort.
Love,
Rose xx
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Thankyou Rose x x
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I’m sorry your family/friends are like that.,we are here to listen and share our feelings. Use us we know how it feels x
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I hope it brings some comfort xx
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Yes it does. A lot x x
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Aww Rose
Thank you. 
I have made a shrine to my Mum. It’s only 4 candles, a fresh flower in a bud vase, a little heart made of gold and a pic of her looking lovely at my Niece’s wedding. This pic is of special importance to me as I did her hair and make up that day just like I did when she died. I talk to it as I pass it by throughout the day. That gives me comfort. Hopefully she is having a blast wherever she is. I think she is.
Take care
Xx
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Hiya Debs
I hear you. It’s painful. Some people just DONT get it. Rather in my experience. MOST people just don’t get it. In my case especially my family. What an absolute let down. I’m having counselling to deal with this “secondary loss “of the relationship I no longer have with my own kids since my Mum died. FFS!!
What a world we live in!!
Luv and hugs xx
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I agree ! What a world ! Where people “attack” widows ! I think we just a scapegoat for their anger !!! I covered some of my kids attitudes in my bereavment counselling but doesn’t make it any easier to deal with really ! Its a tough road isnt it ? I just hope i have enough friends to keep me/us going. Im finding friends more reliable than family atm ! This site has really helped me too because at least we know we not only ones with these problems ! And that helps doesnt it ? Life is tough without the one person who loved us unconditionally ! In my case my husband ! He was such a kind man and protected me right until the last 
i wish he was still here but hes not and so i have to get used to that but its sooo hard !!! Xx
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Hiya Debs
You nailed it!! It is beyond tough losing the one who loved you unconditionally and don’t we know it now!! It is good to vent on here as we are all on the same boat in one respect or another. Some of us have life jackets, some of us don’t but the waves of grief can take us all under at times. All lost in our grief and blindly trying to find a way through. We will get there, but right now it’s bloody hell on earth! How is your Mum doing?
Xx
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Hi honey- thank you for asking about my mum. Shes hanging in there and fighting. We got a few results due tomorrow so i hope they be ok !! Yikes. They trying to get her home which she is really looking forward to but will need help for a while cos shes really weak. Im keeping everything crossed for her !! Xx
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