Hi @Kel2. Please don’t worry about burdening any of us. We’re all heartbroken already so nobody can make it any worse. In fact it helps us all to know we’re not on our own. That’s the whole point. You must unburden to your heart’s content because whatever you’re thinking or feeling you can bet any money that someone on here will have thought or felt it too. Everyone needs somewhere to vent. We’re lucky we have this forum. Love to you. Jean x.
Ps your company are greedy, grasping b******s. Get advice from CAB before you agree to anything.
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Thank you all. I spokevwith ACAS regarding my job, theybsaid the employer can nake a verbal offer, but nothing can officially done unless this is put in writing. I can verbally accept the offer so they put it in writing and then seek legal advice. They cannot hold me to my verbal acceptance, has to be signed.
Im still not ready for work, my head is not in the right place and i still have so much to try sort…
I will have to return to work very soon due to finances, but definitely dont feel i want to return to my employer so think i will ‘verbally’ accept the offer… I need a change.
Im not getting far with everything else that I need to sort… I am so tired, but unable to sleep properly.
I am tired of everything x
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@Kel2 You do not sound well enough for work. You sound far too tired and down. I used to be a manager and if you were my employee I would suggest that you see your Dr as you may need a sick note if you are not ready for the ordeal of seeking other employment. Also be sure that it is absolutely clear it is redundancy and check out what happens when you leave with regard to any benefits and DWP as I do not know of anyone who has had a good experience with them when seeking work. I would rate them at zero for any sympathy and less than that for empathy. All this will sound a bit overwhelming I know but you do not want to add to your burden and it is so hard when you are sleep deprived to do anything at all. I really feel for you as this is such a terrible time. Love and support xx
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Thank you @Mike75.
Once ive had the ‘offer’ in writing from my current employer i will definitely seek advice (will be interesting what they write as the reason) … im not sure if i will be entitled to anything as it will be like voluntary redundancy? I will try look up on the DWP website.
I am signed off at present (so really my employer should not be badgering me)
I will try phone the Drs again this morning anout the sleep issue. They know ive been struggling with lack of sleep, but it isnt getting any better, if anything its worse. Hopefully I can get something to help (starting to affect my health).
Nothing is going right at all xx
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@Kel2 You are doing all the right things. It must be so hard. Sleep deprivation is so difficult to resolve and is so debilitating. We’re behind you here though. xx
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@Kel2 I am so sorry to read what you are going through. Your employer sounds like a complete nightmare. In terms of redundancy; what reason have they given you? Have any other colleagues been offered redundancy? Redundancy payments are (depending on age) 1 weeks pay for every year you were employed with them.
If they simply have chosen you, due to your current circumstances, you have every right to take them to a tribunal. As @Mike75 mentioned, go see your GP & get signed off work for now. Does your company pay sick pay?
Big hug x❤️
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@Dottie72 … im currently getting SSP. The HR last month suggested maybe taking a “settlement/voluntary redundancy tyoe thing so i have a bit of money and dont have to stress about work” - she pushed that they (the board) are questioning why I am still off, and when/if i am going back. They have apparently employed someone to cover while im off… I know they are employing teams in India (i trained 2 of them in between caring for my hubby) … so not costing them a fortune (and has been their msin goal the whole time)
They cant make me redundant as the position is still required.
I told her at the time i am not ready to go back (she knows everything else that has been going on with me - the complaint against the hospital l, husbands work & pensions, mice etc) … i said i do need to look at returning financially, but do not want to go back when i know I cant perform 100% right now. (Will also force me to travel to their offices)
Then Monday the offer is 1month salary, plus any annual leave I’ve accrued from January to date… all done verbally.
Apparently the ‘board’ are questioning about me.
They are getting very busy and cant have me “off”
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Shocking behaviour! They simply cannot suggest redundancy to you just because you are off! As you say, your role is still available, so they are, in theory breaking the law. They are pushing you to leave, which could be considered/viewed as constructive dismissal. They are creating a hostile environment & to suggest redundancy, they are obviously wanting you to leave. I would have a look on the Government website, CAB. Do not accept or sign anything until you receive further advice… x❤️
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Thank you - i’ll try CAB. I figured they were going to try and get ‘rid’ of me … hubbys passing has proven to be an asset to them - they can play on my vulnerability.
I did think to ‘verbally’ accept so i have it in writing… will not sign anything and will seek legal advice.
I honestly don’t want to return there, more so now. X
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@Kel2. I just cannot believe they are treating you like this, it’s appalling behaviour. As employers they have a duty of care to their staff and shouldn’t be putting this amount of pressure on you. If you are signed off sick at the moment they should not be harassing you. Are you on long term sick leave? If not, ask your doctor for a substantial amount of time off and then ignore your work until you have sorted things at home and you are feeling calmer. I can feel your distress in your posts. As @Dottie72 says, do not sign anything until you have proper expert advice. Big cuddle to you. Jean x.
Ps are you able to tell us who it is you work for?
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Thank you @Jean8 . Im currently signed off until April.
I work for a healthcare agency, supplying locums to hospitals… another reason i dont want to go back, since the lack of care/treatment hubby received I dont want to go back into that field of work x
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Oh the irony! You work for a Health Care agency and they are treating you like this. It would be funny if it wasn’t so horrendous.
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@Kel2
I’m so sorry for this extra burden your employers are putting on you. I’m also sorry that I don’t have anything helpful to offer as others thankfully have since I was self employed for most of my life. I just wanted to send my love and say I’m with you all the way.
Karen xxx
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Thank you everyone.
Really does feel like everything is against me. Really have had enough xx
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Can you get anything in writing so you have proof on what they are suggesting?
I am really sorry, because as we all know life is blumming hard enough. All my love & kindest thoughts xxx
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I’ll have to 'verbally ’ accept fir them to put it in writing.
I thinkni am going to have to do that do i can obstion legal advice. At least i can see what they are ‘apparently’ suggesting the severance is - can also explain to the solicitor the calls. (Via whats app so no recordings)
I do have her whats app text messages & email saying she really “needs to talk to me and hasnt heard from me” (this is straight after i submitted my current sick note from my GP (so she has 'technically heard from me) x
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@Kel2 Ask them to set out in writing the specific reasons for them asking you to take redundancy. If it’s simply because you are on long term sick, you will be giving them a headache they deserve. Keep us all updated as there are people here who can help you deal with these b…….s.
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… with everything thats already going against me already, i worry about losing my home (i rent) … finding someone that will accept my pets (not normal pets) will be non-existent.
I lose them (our boys/pets), i truly have lost everything worth being here for x
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No i don’t blame u ? Have you rung ACAS ? X
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