Where are you all from?

Also lovely walks along The Roaches nearby xx

Hi everyone
It seems I’m the only one in the outer Hebrides it’s a beautiful place .

Coffee is not looking good we are all so far away x

Hi everyone

I’ll go for a green tea were I went with George and think of you all over the country.

I live on the isle Of Wight I lost my best platonic male friend 2 years ago he was so dear to me
and I miss him terribly he died of elephantiasis and I found out 2 days after his funeral I also lost my non platonic man friend he was killed riding a cycle (champion) and died of brain damage having thought he had left me (we split up several times) as I didnt hear from him and found out via the Internet -it was a double wammy they were both 68 years old and now Im alone

I’m from South Wales too Teacups . Husband passed away suddenly and unexpectedly 3 months ago . Me and our daughters are missing him dreadfully xxx

Hi Romy how are you doing? Me and mum still missing mum’s partner too. Just still can’t believe it and still so worried about mum. It’s her birthday tomorrow which will be tough but I will try to make a fuss of her and try to make it special. Just hurts me that the only thing she truly wants I can’t give her. Where are you in South Wales? Please do feel free to private message me xxx

Hi teacups . It was one of my daughters birthdays last week and we were all dreading it without my husband /their dad but we ended up having fish and chips and mushy peas and cupcakes and Prosecco and presents and it went better than expected . Maybe do something like that for your mum tomorrow . No cooking if you go to the chip shop . We are from around Swansea . We are all plodding on without my husband . No choice and missing him dreadfully . Also my friends husband died unexpectedly today too so we are all really upset for her and her family about him passing away . Life is so cruel sometimes . Hope that you and your mum will be ok tomorrow . Special days are hard to deal with xxxxx

Thank you Romy - that sounds like a lovely idea. I’m also glad your daughters birthday went better than expected.

You’re not far from us - mum and her partner lived near port talbot.

Sorry to hear about your friend’s husband. You’re right, life is so terribly cruel. Xxxx

Hi lost my mum 3 months ago…so so hard…from lincoln

Hi I lost my husband January this year having a really tough time. Sorry for your losses. I am from manchester. X

My name is Elaine and my husband died January 5th. I’m from Dallas, Tx .USA

Hi Elaine welcome to the forum …I’m sorry for your loss…your so welcome here and there are so many people who are here to listen

Love Michelle

Hi, This is my first post, I lost my husband in June this year, we would have been married 50 years in July. I’m originally from Stockport near to Manchester but living in Huddersfield now. Nice to meet you all. I am also having a bad time coping, I never want to go to bed and when I do I never want to get up. I am having a spinal operation next Monday so worried about that too.

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Dear Pat . I am so sorry about the loss of your husband in June . My husband died suddenly in July . We had been together for 42 years and married for 33. I am from South Wales . I’m ok about going to bed and falling asleep but never sleep through the night as you can see . I had a particularly bad week last week so referred myself for bereavement counselling at the hospital where my husband died after three days in the critical care unit after suffering a sudden cardiac arrest at home with me . My first appointment is tomorrow. One of my daughters had corrective spinal surgery for scoliosis as a teenager so I can appreciate your concerns about going into hospital next Monday and how you will feel after that . I hope you have some family or friends to support and help you when you are back home . You have a lot going on . There are some lovely people on this forum and we have made some good friendships through reaching out to each other here . Welcome to the forum . Losing my husband is the thread I go on the most because everyone there understands what grief feels like . Sending you a big hug . Romy x

Hi Romy, lovely to hear from you, it’s so nice to talk to someone who understands what other people are going through. I hope your counselling session goes OK, my friend list her husband and she said it saved her life. I have had a phone call this afternoon to say my op has been cancelled. I had just resigned myself to having it but now it’s anither waiting game, they did say we would get priority but don’t know how many have been cancelled hey ho, hope you have a better week xxx

Hi Pat . It’s upsetting when you prepare yourself for something like the op on your back and then it gets cancelled last minute because you have to go through all those anticipatory feelings again and obviously you want it done as soon as possible really so you can get on the mend . Yes the counselling meeting is tomorrow at 9 so I had better get up early to get there on time . I think it’s just some sort of assessment at the first session to see if they think you are suitable . I used to be a probation officer and am used to being the one dishing out help and advice so it will be weird being on the receiving end . I have no idea what bereavement counselling is like so we will see . I hope I don’t spend the time in floods of tears . It doesn’t take much . I was in the supermarket yesterday and went over my shopping bill by 55 pence and had left my debit card in the car so was deciding what to tell the cashier to take off my bill when the lady behind me in the queue insisted on giving me a pound . I ended up telling her and the cashier and the couple behind her on the till that I had lost my husband a couple of months ago and that’s why I was a bit all over the place . They all looked shocked and as soon as I said it I thought I was going to cry . I held it together sort of until I got in the car and then cried my eyes out . This grief thing catches me all the time . I was nearly crying in work this afternoon over something …we have a garage …and me and the person who had come to take over doing CPR for Mark while we were waiting for the paramedics and air ambulance to come back in July were talking about stuff and I had a job not to cry again . I don’t know if you are the same . My emotions are all over the place . Anyway I will let you know how tomorrow goes . It’s nice to know that your friend found it useful . Sending a hug . Romy xxx

Hello Pat, I only joined up yesterday. Reading through the posts I spotted yours. I like you lost my husband recently, he died in August. I have had two lots of spinal surgery, the first one in 1984, and a really serious operation was performed by a general orthopaedic surgeon. I was fine. I look at having to have surgery in the following way. The wait (which I feel is the worst) like climbing a mountain, the day of the surgery reaching the peak, then its the journey down to recovery. This way I feel it beaks it up into ‘bites’. The journey going down for me, is my little bit of control to do what I’am being told, and focusing on the goal, the end of the journey. But my heart goes out to you. You are carrying the burden of bereavement with you. I send my best wishes to you. Good luck


I, like you break into tears on occasions where I feel embarrassed. I only joined yesterday. But I can see Iam in good company. Lots of identification. Thank you for your post.


I’m from welling kent…my husband passed from cancer last November 25th so just been 1st year Anniversary …I’m 64 with six granddaughters…

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