Yeh i have found neighbours and friends have showed me more compassion than my own family … its very sad isnt it ? My mum has been good too bless her . Im taking her for a spa day on mothers day xx
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Debs5 that will be nice for your mum she will love it I lost my mum years ago and how much I miss her used to tell her all my problems and she listened will visit her at crematorium on Mother’s day take her her favourite flowers and have a chat to her, as for my neighbour she’s the best texts me regularly saying she done too much tea would I like some sometimes I say had tea because I feel awful got her a thank you card yesterday she cried her eyes out you take care
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Aw thats so nice to have a neighbour like that … youre very lucky. And yeh looking after my mum while i still got her. Shes so spirited at 83 - she makes me laugh xx
@Deb5 @Jennison1946 I am very grateful that our daughters care enough to ask how I am, usually phone at the weekends and don’t mind me admitting when things have not been great.
We are all going away for my birthday (it has a 0 in…) at the end of March, which is something to look forward to.
@shellmiller my brother and sister on the other hand, not so great, one email from my brother but nothing to my reply and not a peep from my sister, when Jaq was in the hospice I did email them and my sister’s reply was that she hadn’t been in contact (over the past 2 1/2 years) because she “didn’t want to intrude”
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Families !! I give up half the time tbh - cant really win … Xx
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It’s just over a year for me since Keef went but I still have days/moments when I cry uncontrollably. I have been seeing a counsellor for a few months now, private, and it has helped. She enables me to speak honestly about how I’m feeling and the relationship we had over the 44 years we were together. I too really hate living alone as have never done it before in my life, still it would seem that I won’t be alone for long! My grown up autistic son moved to Bournemouth in December last year but now says he wants to come home but now until later in the year which will give me time to sort the house out to accommodate him!
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Hi Louise, I can completely relate to what you say…I’m exactly the same. Its just over 3 years now since losing the love of my life and in that time I feel I’ve been to hell and back . I used to be so outgoing and confident but now I’m always expecting something to go wrong and feeling on edge. I can go for days feeling reasonably ok, but then from nowhere something hits me full on and I fall to pieces, sobbing, shouting out and sometimes throwing myself about…I cant help it, so you;re not alone in this and please dont ever feel that way…let it out, we all need to support each other. Take care
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I can’t cope with the thought that I might be feeling the same in three years George. Do you now have more good days than bad? Some people here say they still have bad days when it is all very raw again but fewer of them. That I think I could cope with.
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Its not raw @Louise1951 after 14 months i have very sad days and days when i really miss him … not gonna lie. Its like a rollercoaster of emotions tbh … one day you’re fine and then something triggers you and you go down the hill of emotions. I dont think we should fear it … just ride with the waves of emotion xx
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It’s still very early days for you. I lost my husband 13 months ago and life will never be the same any more. Every day is difficult, I cry for anything and everything and don’t seem to find any purpose in this new unknown existence. Sending you a big hug x
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When i took the dog out for a walk this morning, i put my ear buds in and was listening to the radio during the walk, Endless Love came on, it was our song and the song we played at Andrew’s funeral, next thing a know im sobbing my heart out, its the first time ive heard it since the funeral 6 months ago 
. Poor dog didn’t know what to do, i was just rooted to the spot.
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Hello. I have had a day today as you described when everything comes crashing down and I feel back to square one. 18 months since my husband passed away and I have some good days. I am 71 and have lost my confidence and hate when things go wrong that my husband would have taken care of. Take care
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Hi, nice to hear from you and sorry to hear that you too are struggling. Val & myself always did everything together and never had our “own” chores, we just shared everything and just got on with it, but now with everything being my responsibility I think thats what I find most stressful, even small jobs. I used to be always doing things around the house but since Val’s been gone I just dont see the point anymore and seem to have lost all motivation. I really hope that things improve for us both and others on this forum. and we can pick up the pieces again. Take care, chin up
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Thank you for your kind words. It helps a lot to know that there are others on this site that are feeling the same and facing the same sorrow. Every thing that goes wrong whatever it is fills me with dread as husband either took care of things or we worked it out together. Take care
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Yeh im same. If things go wrong you just panic dont you ? Because we had them to support us didnt we and now we dont 
so tough dome days. Im off to hide under the duvet this afternoon. Taking dog for a walk first and then that’s my plan. Take care xxx
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I probably should be past this by now. It’s 18 months. I got on and out from the very start because I couldn’t bear to be home without him. I went to events, theatres, movies, always alone. My friends all have their husbands, people think I’m fine now anyway, it’s a long time since…
But it’s not! Not to me. I feel like I’m going backwards, less out, less making phone calls to people, more tears.
I still have the inertia, can sit for hours doing nothing constructive. Everything is just too much bother.
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Aw …,14 months for me and its still tough isnt it ? I still find it hard some days. My emotions are all over the place some days … still ! Maybe you suppressed a lot of emotions at beginning and that’s why they coming out now xx
Today its been 6 months since Andrew passed away, it still feels like yesterday. I’ve missed him so much and i really don’t know how i will get through the rest of life without my rock by my side. I want to life my life for both of us, but it just feels unbearable
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I can totally resonate with what you’re going through. It’s going to be 10 months tomorrow since I lost my angel. I miss him so much every day and life without him is so meaningless so I get some comfort by talking to him everyday and telling him that I will be living my life for both of us doing what we used to do together but doing alone with him, although not physically but in my heart and mind. 
Take care x
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Yeh but thats the bit i find hard ! Doing it alone ! Its crap ! xx
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