Thank you so much my husband only turned 50, I am 48. I definitely need your support as I have 3 children and they need support with the loss of their father.
There are days I don’t want to live but wouldn’t do anything as my children need me.
Like everyone else we were the other half of each other and still never finished our journey. I am ever so grateful to you reaching out to me as I need to be able to chat with people that get it x
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Hi Peter
Love and Light eminated I believe from Spiritually but Im pretty much guessing because I thought I had made it up but apparently I didnt. Hope this helps.
Love and Light
Geoff x
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when I was teaching and practicing reiki, we blessed Love and Light to everyone, embracing in the love and the light of the universe helps us to heal from within
hope today is an improvement on yesterday and tomorrow is an improvement on today
blessings
Jen🦋
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Hello Geoff. Geoff, I have just gone back to the beginning of this thread and read that your dear Anne died the same way that my own darling Gill did. I am so very sorry mate, you must be carrying around the same sort of horrible images that I am. I really wouldn’t wish them on anybody. I cry whenever they resurface, I would have done anything to spare her those last two days, but all I could do was to hold her and cry. I’m off again - isn’t it bloody hell? I hope Tesco never runs out of gin, I couldn’t make it through the day without.
Love and Light (if you will excuse me)
Peter
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Hi i feel exactly the same after losing my partner in july i look forward to bed -time as at least i can forget everything for a couple of hours waking up in the mornings is the worst as he’s not there and i have to get through another day without him only my cats are keeping me going a reason to get up
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@Debbie13 So glad you posted on my topic. We understand exactly how you feel. Sleep is a gift to us and I am still waiting for John to make an appearance! Our cats are such a comfort to us. What would we do without the cuddles and purring 
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My cats seem to understand i’m sure they miss ed as much as me i ask him every night to visit me in my dreams so far he hasn’t i’ve got his ashes near the bed it comforts me to think he’s still near me it’s hard without him after 19 years together i don’t know how any of us keep going at times
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Dear Peter
We seem to be grieving at a similar level my friend. I too again just burst into tears as I went for a walk today. This life at the moment is a living hell and I cant see any light at the end of the tunnel. Im not even sure if I want to? The memories of my sweet Anne I never want to fade even if that means suffering or reliving the awful times both past and present. Im flattered that you’ve taken to ’ Love and Light’
Love and Light
Geoff x
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Hi Debbie and all —I so hate that moment when you wake and the reality of life starts again and have to think how can I make this day ok enough to get through it —I have my husbands ashes with me too --its some comfort -its been 11 weeks and its still hard to accept that I will never see him again and watching him go downhill so quickly with lung cancer still haunts me and having to accept the evitable end. I walk my dog every morning --its makes me start the day --thank goodness for our pets x
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Dear Geoff
I am so sorry for your devastating loss. I understand how you are feeling because I lost my wonderful husband nearly 15 months ago and a day has not passed when I wish I could go to sleep and never wake up. I dread growing old without John, and I dread every day struggling on with no meaning in my life. I hope so much that it will get better in time and that it will for you too. Sending comfort and strength. Barbara
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@Barbara1949 Oh Barbara 15 months and you still feel as bad as me. It’s a never ending nightmare. We will never get over losing our John. What did we ever do to deserve this?
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It is a small comfort to know that I’m not alone feeling like this. It is a continual nightmare that never leaves me. Sending love Bx
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I have just returned from walking Flora on a beautiful, sunny, morning. I cried most of the way. A few fellow dog walkers seemed to look at me with silent compassion. I now have to worry about Flora, she is not eating with her usual beagle enthusiasm. I am so bloody lonely without Gill that I drift through every day in a fog of despair, it is all so totally pointless now. I read up on Dignitas, apparently they will only accept people with severe physical illness.
I wish I had a big country house, I would invite you all to live there with me. We could employ a cook, and have a very well stocked bar. There would be only one rule and that would be a mandatory morning and evening hug for everyone. We could stay in our rooms and cry or we could meet in the sitting room and talk about our loved ones.
Us against the ugly world. I’m rambling, I really believe I am losing my mind.
Thinking of you all and offering a big hug. Peter
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Hi yes that feeling is so awful ed also had lung cancer pneumonia and c b d it’s the hardest thing ever to deal with nothing compares with watching them go downhill so fast and being helpless to do anything i walk with my friend and her dog every evening and it helps being out in the fresh air i’m dreading christmas 1st one without him but my 3 cats will keep me going x
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Dear Bristles,
We are going through the same heartbreak. Please know that if you want to write or talk I am here. B x
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Dear PeterL
When you buy your country house, I will be the first in the queue. We all need the company of those who understand. B x
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Peter that’s a great idea if only ! At least we would all be together knowing how we all feel and not having to go out in the world forcing a smile on our faces just to get through debbie x
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Dear Bristles
You share my sentiments entirely. Despite having lost my reason to live - my beautiful wife Anne - 15 months ago I cannot see my grief and miserable pointless existance ever changing. Yes praying is a waste of time as I’ve found out. Ive lost interest in all my old activities and with nothing inspiring on the horizon. Truly a living torturous hell.
Love and Light
Geoff x
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Dear Bristles
Once again I’m with you 100%. Those bloody clichés wind me up as well. Here’s a few more thats guaranteed to kick me off ‘Time is a great healer.’ Usually from some patronising well wisher thats never lost their soul mate! ’ AND. ‘Anne wouldn’t like to see you unhappy.’ How the hell do you work with a platitude like that ? Take care my friend.
Love and Light
Geoff x
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@PeterL You are such a lovely man and we are so glad you post on here. It does help a little to know others are feeling exactly the same. I might just mention my daughter got me some St Johns Wort from Holland and Barrett two weeks ago. Herbal for low mood and slight depression. The past two days I have noticed a slight improvement. Just a little less darkness. I am still crying every day and still don’t want to wake up but there is a difference. Perhaps you might consider trying them. Big hug to you and I am sure we would all like to visit you in your ‘big house’