He was my first true love, we dated for two years and then remained close friends for 8. We were always drawn to each other and he was always there for me through thick and thin. Sadly his partner had an issue with our friendship and pulled us apart.
I feel like I am grieving on my own in the dark because we weren’t allowed to be friends anymore. All of his friends are together and his family are there for each other and I feel like I am spiralling. Has anyone else ever experienced anything like this? I feel so broken and alone 8 months on 
Know exactly how you feel. I was with my boyfriend for 8 years and I’m so lonely now he’s gone. His kids all have partners to help them through it etc and I’ve nobody.
Well Guys. You may not have anyone close to talk to but you have us. Loss is loss whichever way you look at it, and is not confined to husbands, partners or relatives. Pain and grief can come with the loss of a friend especially one you felt close to. A big void opens up because we just can’t believe it’s happened. You will get replies from those who have lost dear friends. We are all a very understanding lot on here and I hope you get a little comfort for being here.
Take it easy, well as easy as you can. It’s a process is grief and it can gradually subside, but it may take a while. Allow it to happen. Let your emotions go. It’s all part of natures way of grieving.
Blessings to you both. Take special care of yourselves. John.
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I’m so sorry to hear about the death of your ex. It is natural to grieve for him, as he was once a big part of your life, and was still your friend. It sounds as though you are feeling very isolated and that you can’t grieve openly for him. I’m glad that you’ve found this site, as it’s really important to have somewhere you can share those feelings.
Here are some other posts by people who have lost an ex - these are a bit older, so the posters might not be active on the site any more, but it might help you to feel a little less alone in what you are experiencing:
Death of ex wife
Loss of an ex partner
Does it get easier
This article about Disenfranchised Grief on the site What’s Your Grief? talks about the difficulties of grieving a loss that it is not widely understood or accepted that you’ll be grieving for - with losing an ex as one of the examples covered.
A first love is often a very important part of our life. Don’t feel guilty for grieving, as clearly he was very special. Take care.