I lost my dad in 2018 to copd/pneumonia and there when he passed, I have this image of his last hrs in hospital, everything we said and everything upto the last seco d as he was taken away on that trolley, I then lost my best friend (she was 42) in 2018 to a 5 year battle with the big ‘C’ she was my go to when times were hard, we saw each other at least once a week and messaged each other everyday, then during this pandemic my grandad was put into a home ‘to die’, no visits just chats through the window whilst he slowly ditiriarated with cancer and a blood clot to the leg, he was 89 but wasn’t a dignified way to die… How do I cope with this? How do I grieve without being angry at the loss as I know they won’t get to come back?
I’m so sorry to hear about the loss of your dad, your friend and your grandad - that is such a lot of grief to deal with in a short space of time. I’m sorry also to hear that you weren’t able to visit your grandad and that you feel he didn’t have dignity in his last months.
Anger can be a very common part of grief. It’s important to have people to talk to and somewhere to let those emotions out (even if that’s just writing them down here on this site), as bottling them up can make things worse.
While you wait for more replies to your post, here are some posts by others who’ve been through multiple losses - you might find it helpful to have a read and reply if you’d like to talk more to them:
@Cherry65 posted: So angery
@Mandie posted: Struggling to cope with loss
Thank you x I have managed to get a consultation via video appointment to access some grief support
That’s great - I hope you find it helpful.
I am very sorry Adele that you have had so many losses within such a short time. I do understand the same thing happened to me
How did your video consultation go? We are living in such strange and worrying times we never know what “tomorrow” may bring, I am 81 years old and I have never known such strange times.
Thank you for the reply xThe consultation appointment went well and I have signed up for 6 sessions, hopefully this will help x
Hi Adele, I am so sorry for your triple loss. It is so hard to cope with one trauma on top of another. I hope you have family and friends to support you. The counselling sessions should be a help to you.
Take care and warm wishes, AL x
Bless you Mary, you certainly do know the impact of triple loss.
We certainly are living in strange times. xx
Thank you, AL2020
I have said so often, I am glad that I am old and not just starting out, I feel sorry for our great-grandson who is only 2 years old.
I feel the same Mary. Our grandsons are aged 3 and 6. My son is concerned for their future and it is hard to convince him not to be concerned.
Oh dear! we are in a black mood this evening… time to go back to the humour thread.
Adele, sorry for diverting from your topic, but you know we care. x